Fushigi Cluegi
by AlinaintheSky
Summary: The Seiryu seishi become the members of Clue when Tomo's makeup shows up missing! And who will be Mrs. White? He he he...... PG-13 for language
1. Lost makeup!

Disclaimer: I do not own Fushigi Yugi, Harry Potter characters, the Simpsons characters (though if I did, I'd make a fortune!), Bye Bye Birdie characters, or Clue, but I do own this hysterical idea! I also own Hilary, Sarah, and whoever else I decide to put in here that is not from an idea owned by someone else. Make sense? No? Good. Oh, and Liss is me, just so ya know.  
Liss- One day, Tomo woke up in his bed. He opened his eyes and yawned. He was still half-asleep.  
  
Tomo- *yawn* I'm still half asleep.  
  
Liss- I just said that, you moron! Anyway, Tomo sleepily got up and went over to his vanity desk. He reached for his hairbrush, and brushed his long, dark hair into a ponytail. Then, still half-asleep, he felt for his makeup.  
  
Tomo- *feel feel* I'm feeling around for my makeup.  
  
Liss- Will you stop doing that!!??  
  
Tomo- Sorry.  
  
Liss- Anyway, as I was saying before I was so RUDELY interrupted! TWICE! *glares at Tomo* Tomo felt around his vanity desk for his makeup.  
  
Soi- Vanity desk? What the hell is that?  
  
Liss- You know! The thing that you put your makeup bottles on....with the big mirror...and the lights....?  
  
Soi- I'm confuzzled.  
  
Liss- Shut up and go back to your room!  
  
Soi- Fine, fine. *jumps into Liss's head and goes to sleep*  
  
Liss- That's better. *turns to freaked out audience* For the illuminating story on what just happened, please contact me.  
  
Tomo- *wide-eyed* O-kaaaaaaaay. Hm.  
  
Liss- *growls*  
  
Tomo- Hee hee! *nervous laugh*  
  
Liss- Get back to the story!  
  
Tomo- Hm. That's weird.  
  
Liss- He now used both hands to search the desktop. Then he stopped.  
  
Tomo- Hm. I guess it's not here.  
  
Liss- His eyes bulged as he realized what he just said.  
  
Tomo- Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!  
  
Zoom out to palace Zoom out to country Zoom out to world Zoom out to galaxy  
  
Liss- Meanwhile, at the breakfast table.  
  
Soi- Did you just hear something?  
  
Nakago- I'm sorry, what?  
  
Liss- Back at Tomo's room.  
  
Tomo- Omigod! Omigod! Omigod! Where is it? Nooooo!  
  
Servant- Is something wrong, Tomo-san?  
  
Tomo- I can't find my makeup! Have you seen it?  
  
Servant- No, Tomo-san. I have not.  
  
Tomo- Did anyone else come in here any time?  
  
Servant- No, Tomo-san. Not that I saw, anyway.  
  
Tomo- Damn.  
  
Servant- I am very sorry. I know what you are thinking. If no one was here, then who could have taken it?  
  
Tomo- No, I mean, damn, Nakago wasn't here. I'll wait for him forever though. Are you sure he wasn't here?  
  
Servant- *huge sweat drop* Uh, yes, Tomo-san. *exits quickly*  
  
Tomo- Crap. I guess I have to go around without makeup for today, until I can buy some more. *takes deep breath* No makeup. *starts sweating* No makeup. *hardly breathing* No makeup! *faints onto bed*  
  
Kim MacAfee- Tell me, do I sound that stupid on stage?  
  
Liss- Yes. But Tomo brings a new meaning to the word 'scary'.  
  
Tomo- Hey!  
  
* * *  
  
Liss- A room in the palace.  
  
Suboshi- So, um, Yui. You wanna, um, go for a walk?  
  
Yui- Ech! Not with you!  
  
Subo- Aniki! Aniki! *runs over and clutches Amiboshi*  
  
Amiboshi- *rolls eyes* Thanks, Yui. Now he'll be over me all day.  
  
Yui- He he!  
  
Nelson- Hey! That's my line! I've been using it for 10 years! Get your own!  
  
Yui- *sticks tongue out at him*  
  
Nelson- *leaves*  
  
Soi- Kids, kids, stop fighting like babies. You don't see glorious, incredible, dreamy, handsome.... *trails off. Her eyes go all glossy and a goofy smile creeps onto her face*  
  
All- *ahem *  
  
Soi- *comes back to reality, embarrassed* Anyway, you don't see Nakago acting like this.  
  
Liss- Suddenly, they become aware of a figure watching them from the doorway. They all stare at it.  
  
All- *mouth drops*  
  
Liss- The incredibly handsome figure walked into the room.  
  
Soi- Nakago! You dyed your hair! And you made it longer!  
  
Liss- She doesn't use logic when she thinks about Nakago.  
  
Soi- *gets uncomfortably close to figure* So, um, you wanna go and make some little critters? *seductively growls*  
  
Figure- Ew!  
  
Soi- *leans in and starts kissing him*  
  
Figure- Ech! Get offa me, you slut! *pushes her away and starts wiping mouth*  
  
Soi- Tomo?  
  
Liss- The whole room gasped.  
  
The whole room- *gasp*  
  
Liss- WILL YOU STOP DOING THAT?!  
  
All- Sorry.  
  
Soi- Ew! I kissed Tomo! Aah! It burns! It BURNS!!!! *runs out screaming, clutching mouth*  
  
Yui- Wow, Tomo. You look pretty cute without your makeup on.  
  
Tomo- *flushes * Thanks, but I'm not nearly as pretty as Nakago!  
  
All- *huge sweat drop* Yep. It's Tomo all right.  
  
Tomo- *snapping out of gross [lemon] reverie* Anyway, I need your help. Someone has stolen my makeup! *pauses for gasps. Crickets chirp* O-kaay. Anyway, will you help me?  
  
Yui- Ooh! Ooh! I have a good idea! In my world, there's this game called Clue. They made it into a book series and a movie. *explains Clue* What do you think?  
  
Amiboshi- Sounds like fun.  
  
Subo- *inches next to Yui* Yeah. Its' a great idea. *smiles*  
  
Yui- Ew! GET AWAY FROM ME!  
  
Subo- *hangs head*  
  
Tomo- Yui, I like this plan. And since this is my case, I'll be Mr. Body.  
  
Amiboshi- I'll be the wise and educated Prof. Plum!  
  
Yui- *stifles giggle*  
  
Miboshi- Ah, heck. I'll be that Mr. Green guy.  
  
Yui- *looks at Subo winking at her* And I'll be the smart, sophisticated, incredibly UNINTERESTED Mrs. Peacock.  
  
Subo- Fine. That leaves me with Col. Mustard.  
  
Soi- *just burst into the room* And I'll be the gorgeous Miss Scarlet!  
  
Ron Weasley- *randomly appears at the door* Ha! That name fits you well! After all, you are a scarlet woman! *throws head back and laughs hysterically. Abruptly stops when he realizes that no one else is laughing* You know? Scarlet woman? Oh, nevermind. That's what my mum calls 'em.  
  
Harry Potter- *bursts in, too* Since when?  
  
Weasel- *shrugs* Since the 4th book, I guess.  
  
Liss- Both of them leave. Bye Weasel! Bye Potty! Say hello to Parvati for me! A wide, chibi-eyed cast of Seiryu seishi and miko stare after them.  
  
Tomo- Sheesh. Our guards are not doing their jobs. Moving on.......  
  
Yui- We still need someone to be Mrs. White.  
  
Liss- At that unfortunate time, Nakago conveniently walks in. Mwahahahahahaha. Aren't I evil? *happy, evil grin*  
  
Nakago- *notices everyone is staring at him* What?  
  
*whole cast advances on him with wicked grins on their faces*  
  
Liss- So, how'd you like it? I thought it was pretty funny. But who am I to judge my own work? I'm me, of course! Anyway, if anyone found this confuzzling, especially with the Weasel and the Potty, please let me know. Also, if anyone does not know what Clue is, please tell me and I will make that the next chapter. Thankies! 


	2. Outfits

Disclaimer: Hi! I didn't realize this was so popular! I got like 6 reviews, and I just posted it the day before! Thank you to all my reviewers. I don't own Clue, FY, or anyone else that I decide to put in that I don't own. Make sense? No? Good. I'm still doing my job!  
Liss- It is the same day as before.  
  
Yui- Ok, now, here are your clothes for your parts. Go put them on, and let's see what you look like! *hands everyone their clothes*  
  
Tomo- How did you get these?  
  
Yui- Old school uniforms.  
  
Amiboshi- You wore these?! *holds up outrageous purple pants and a headdress with lots of feathers*  
  
Yui- Shut up and just try them on!  
  
Liss- After they have them on.  
  
Yui- *sitting with Tomo, wearing feathered dress and a feathered headdress, with diamond glasses and matching shoes* Ok, now, who's first? How about you, Miboshi?  
  
Miboshi- *comes out in business suit that is 3 times bigger than him* Um, I think it's too big.  
  
Liss- No really? Where'd you get that brilliant idea?  
  
Miboshi- *glares*  
  
Liss- Aw, he's so cute when he glares! *makes cooing voice* Who's a cute wittle baby? Who's a cute wittle baby? You are! Yes you are! Yes you are!  
  
Miboshi- *glares and sits down next to Tomo, who is wearing a black tux, nothing special*  
  
Yui- Ok, who's next? Suboshi, come out here!  
  
Subo- *comes out in yellow suit with a glass thingy for his eye, ya know, that thing that always rests on one of the eyes of rich men? Ah, whatever. He also has a cane* This is so weird!  
  
Yui- I think you look nice. It matches your hair.  
  
Subo- Really? Well, then, I like it too! *puts hands on his jacket and smiles*  
  
Yui- Oh, brother!  
  
Amiboshi- You called for me? I am Suboshi's brother! *comes out in purple striped pants, maroon shirt, purple jacket, and a big polka-dotted bowtie* This was actually you're school uniform?!  
  
Subo- Don't make fun of her!  
  
Amiboshi- *rolls eyes* This is pitiful.  
  
Yui- Soi, some out here!  
  
Soi- *appears at the door, leaning sexily. She waltzes in and spins around, wearing a tight red dress [not too modest], red pumps, and matching earrings*  
  
All boys in the room- *jaw drops*  
  
Weasel- *appears at window* Ha! You DO look like a scarlet woman! *starts to laugh but stops at seeing how beautiful Soi looks*  
  
Liss- Ok. See ya later, Weasel! *pushes him out the window*  
  
Weasel- Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!!  
  
Soi- *smiles and sits down*  
  
Subo- Wow. Yui, YOU wore that?! *envisions what Yui would look like in the dress*  
  
Yui- STOP THAT RIGHT NOW! *whacks him upside the head* Now then. The only person left is Nakago. Nakago, come out here! Right now!  
  
Nakago's voice- Do I have to?  
  
Yui- Yes!  
  
Nakago- Please?  
  
Yui- Hurry up!  
  
Nakago- Fine. *sheepishly appears at door, wearing a white maid's outfit [not French, I may add] stopping at the knees, carrying a feather duster, and wearing a little white hat to match*  
  
All- *burst out laughing*  
  
Liss- Yes! Aren't I good?  
  
Nakago- *gives all the death glare*  
  
All- *stop laughing abruptly. Then start laughing again*  
  
Amiboshi- Sorry, Nakago. The death glare just doesn't work in a maid's outfit!  
  
Soi- *stifles giggle* I think you look....very.....nice. * tries horribly to control herself. Fails miserably*  
  
Tomo- Stop laughing! Even though he does look ridiculous......! *starts to laugh*  
  
Nakago- I hate the media.  
  
Liss- *now rolling on the floor, clutching side, tears streaming down face* Now, now *giggle* It isn't nice to *giggle* laugh *giggle* at him! Aw, what am I saying? Laugh, dammit! LAUGH!!!!!!!!!  
  
Everyone- *keeps laughing*  
  
Weasel and Potty- *appears randomly at door* Hey, he does look funny!  
  
Dracy-poo- *appears, too* No he doesn't! He looks really sexy!  
  
Liss- Just so ya's know, I always thought that in the second movie, it looked like Draco wanted every person he looked at, even if they were a boy. I mean, did you see the look on his face when he glared at Harry and Hermione? He wanted them so bad!  
  
Tomo and Soi- *stop laughing and stalk towards window where Dracy-poo is and push him out* Nakago's mine!  
  
Dracy-poo- Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!!!!  
  
Liss- See ya later, Dracy! Potty, Weasel, get outta here. And tell Hagrid that Norbert met a girl. *pushes Weasel and Potty out the window, too*  
  
Weasel and Potty- Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!  
  
Liss- Moving on. I will post more next chappie. Now, press the little purple button down there! That's it! You got it! 


	3. Explanation If you don't know what Clue ...

Disclaimer: Hi. A few of you asked what Clue is. Since I do not want you to have no idea whatsoever what my story is about, I have decided to tell you what Clue is.  
  
Clue is a wonderful game/movie/book series. I am not sure what it was first, but I think it was a board game first. It is a mystery game where the players try to find out who shot Mr. Body, the host. Then, the game was made into a fabulous movie. In the game, the players pick which people they want to be, Miss Scarlet, Col. Mustard, Mr. Green, Prof. Plum, Mrs. Peacock, and Mrs. White. These are all assumed names, of course. For the whole game is based on secrecy, and the characters do not want their real names to be known.  
  
The book series are little mysteries in which you have to figure out who did the crime. That is basically what you have to figure out for the movie and the game.  
  
Miss Scarlet is supposed to be a slut who has a million boyfriends and is rich because of them. Mrs. Peacock is a sophisticated old lady, very proper, and very prim. Mrs. White is the middle-aged, harassed-looking, miserable maid. People always make fun of her in the game. No one wants to be her (now you know why Nakago is her!). Mr. Green is the business-man who is a huge money-lover. He always is very order-like. Col. Mustard, a retired colonel in the army, is, well, I don't know a lot about his traits. He is basically like Mr. Green. Prof. Plum, the wise, educated professor?! I think not, Amiboshi! He is, indeed, wise and educated, but is useless. He always forgets everything and he is always misplacing something or another. Mr. Body is the host. He is very kind, very rich, and very stupid. In every mystery, he is either shot or robbed by his six greedy guests, and he still invites them over for a stay next month!  
  
In the game, there are a lot of rooms, weapons, and people to chose from. When a person wants to guess who has done it, they say, "I think it was _________, in the ____________, with the _____________." Then, they check to see if they are right. So later in the story, I will be putting in sentences like that.  
  
I think that's basically all you need to know. If you have any more questions or I didn't explain it right, I will be happy to tell you again, after I pound your mouth in for not listening to me! Just kidding. Enjoy the story! 


	4. Uh, this may take awhile

Disclaimer: I own neither Clue nor FY. So bug off!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Yui: Okay, we'll start with dinner.  
  
Amiboshi: But it's only 11:30.  
  
Yui: Shut up! Now, we will go into the dining room and be greeted by our cook. Let's go!  
  
All: *trudge into dining room*  
  
Soi: It's empty!  
  
Yui: No shit, Sherlock.  
  
All: *trudge over to kitchen*  
  
Yui: Well, where's the cook?  
  
Cook: *turns around*  
  
All: Aah! It's you!  
  
Miaka: That's right! I just love food! And boy was that dinner good!  
  
Yui: You ate it all?!  
  
Miaka: Yep!  
  
Yui: Well I hope you know that one of those dishes was monkey's brains.  
  
Miaka: @_@ I-I ate a poor little m-monkey's b-brain?  
  
Yui: *nods evilly*  
  
Miaka: Waaaaaaaaaaah! Oh well, it was good!  
  
Yui: Grr...  
  
All: *trudge out of kitchen*  
  
Amiboshi: Um, hey, Yui? Which one of us was supposed to eat the monkey's brains?  
  
Yui: Uh, well, heh heh, in the movie, it was Mrs. Peacock, but actually, I was gonna force Suboshi to eat it.  
  
Miboshi: Aw, man! Damn Miaka!  
  
Suboshi: Yes, that stinks! I wouldn't have minded it if it was you, Yui. *shy smile*  
  
Yui: *looks around quickly for anything to knock him out*  
  
Tomo: Yui, what's next?  
  
Yui: Well, actually, I don't know. Let's ask the authoress.  
  
All: *looks up* Authoress, what comes next?  
  
Authoress: I think I hear the wind.  
  
All: *sigh* O most wonderful authoress, queen of the stories and most of all humor, please give us the knowledge that we seek.  
  
A: And?  
  
All: *sigh* And let us bow down to your awesome power. *bowing*  
  
A: I'm waiting.  
  
Nakago: And *blush* I am a *looks at card* Poopey-faced monkey's ass that doesn't have a shred of humanity. You may call me Mr. Ugly Mullet-Man.  
  
Anime party people of 2003: Mullet! Mullet! Mullet!  
  
Authoress: Damn straight. Now, what do you want to know?  
  
Tomo: We would like to know what comes next in this mystery.  
  
A: Oh, um...well, it's a funny story about that..heh heh...  
  
Tomo: What?  
  
A: Okay, okay, I need to see the movie first! I forget exactly what comes next, okay! My memory isn't perfect, as many of you out there well know! So don't rub it in my face, um...uh...what was your name again?  
  
Tomo: *sighs* Tomo.  
  
A: Don't you look at me in that tone of voice, Mister!  
  
Tomo: *whimpers*  
  
A: Anyway, until I rent the movie from that wonderful store called Hollywood Video, I can't finish the story.  
  
All: Aw, man!  
  
A: Yes, yes, I'm sorry. So while you're waiting, why don't you play a game or something?  
  
All: We were, until you stopped it!  
  
A: *growls*  
  
All: Heh heh, sorry!  
  
A: Good. Now, go do something while I go find my mom and beg her to take me there. *leaves*  
  
Tomo: Phew, she's gone.  
  
A: I'm the authoress, dumbass! I can still hear you!  
  
Yui: Riiiight. Anyway, we should play a game until she gets the movie. How about we play Bull?  
  
Amiboshi: What's that?  
  
Yui: It's a game you play with cards. Uh, Almighty Authoress, can I have a deck of cards?  
  
A: Sure, whatever.  
  
Yui: *deck of cards pops into her hands* Thank you!  
  
A: Don't mention it. Ever.  
  
Soi: Hey, aren't you supposed to be gone?  
  
A: Uh...heh heh heh.....bye! *leaves for real*  
  
Yui: So anyway, in the game, I give each of you a few cards. *deals*  
  
All: Ooh!  
  
Soi: Hey! This lady looks prettier than me! Die! *zaps queen of hearts*  
  
Nakago: W-What is this magic? I do not know of anything that looks like this. I must study it!!! *looks intently at card*  
  
Suboshi: *slyly* You know, Yui, I don't really understand this game. Maybe I should sit next to you. You could help me play. *inches next to her*  
  
Yui: Oh dear god, what have I done to deserve this? What?! Tell me wwhhhyyyyyyy!!!  
  
People-who-sing-that-song-but-the-authoress-forgets-their-name: *singing* Tell me wwhhhhyyyyyy you cry! And why you liiiiiiiiiieeee to meeeeeeeeeeeee!  
  
Yui: *sighs and puts head in hand* It's gonna be a long wait.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Liss: I'm sorry, but it's true. I have to get the movie first, cuz I don't remember what comes next! But I will update as son as possible. You know what would help? A REVIEW!!! 


End file.
